July 13th, 2010

daddy

Not Quite Forgiveness

Someone recently asked me how I could have been kind to my abusive father in his final illness. It’s a long story, and not simple.

This is all written at arm’s length. It’s the only way I can talk about it right now. Collapse )

If there’s a neat quick moral lesson here, it’s this: Be gentle with others. Be aware always of the effect you are having on other people. They’re not all-powerful. They may be scared insecure lonely kids inside, too.

I’m still working on being gentle with myself. I was kind to my father. Maybe someday I’ll learn to be kind to me. (As opposed to self-indulgent, which I can usually manage quite well.)

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Things that Make Everything Better

A new meme swiped from [profile] labelleizzy.

What things make everything better?

For me:
beautiful music
the smell of actual lilacs ("lilac" perfume is an abomination unto Nuggan)
holding [personal profile] gramina or [profile] abostick59
something good to read
hot tea (or iced, depending on season)
spices that I'm not allergic to
driving up into the mountains
walking in a redwood forest
Gabriel on my lap
the new kitten
doing something for someone else
writing it out
getting comments on my writing that show I've reached people

What things make everything better for you?